Troublesome threes

Not sure what you call the “threes”. We breezed through birth, had a little rockiness from weeks 2 -7, but with Zoe it’s been a very easy ride, up until now that is.

She was even fine when Ava was a tiny baby but now that Ava is getting a bit older, she is driving me nuts. She is generally fine, just mostly needs to be prompted to say please and thank you. I tend to hear “I want…” a lot. In the back of my mind I still hear my mom saying, “I want gets nothing.” So far the penny hasn’t dropped yet. But that really is very minor. What I can’t take is the hurting of Ava. Yesterday I took them both shopping, why I have no idea, it was a nightmare. I wanted to try and find something to wear for a black tie thing we’re going to on Saturday. I challenge you to find something to wear (in PE) with a 3 year old and almost 1 year old in tow. I went into Jenni Button and the sales lady was telling me all about various deals while Zoe was pushing Ava around the shop in her buggy, out the shop, into the wall, as well as touching all the clothes. You can just imagine how much of what she (the saleswoman) was trying to tell me, I took in. We didn’t stay there very long.

My mind keeps thinking of all these child snatching stories that are circling because of the World Cup. I’m trying to get Zoe to hold my hand and walk next to the buggy but she was having none of that, racing off in different directions my blonde haired, blue-eyed little “angel”. I gave up on the clothes shopping and went to Woolies to get some food. Suddenly it dawned on me, I had a child in a buggy, how on earth could I push a trolley? So, Zoe now had the job of pushing Ava around Woolies food section while I push the trolley. It was about 3.30pm so nice and busy as well. OMW, what a fool I am but it actually went reasonably well except for when Zoe walked off quite a distance and for a minute I thought someone had stolen them both. I know very irresponsible mommy but this was Woolies and we do live in PE. On our way back to the car, I spot something in Urban that I like (not for Saturday night though) but obviously need to try it on. There’s basically just me in the shop with about 5 assistants so I leave the girls with them while I try on. I then hear blood-curdling yells from Ava. Dress as fast as possible, only to get told that Zoe had just been biting Ava’s foot through her Shoo-shoos (totally leather so very soft). I mean, goodness gracious how nasty is that. We then had a few more incidents, as the afternoon progressed, of Ava crying as a result of being picked up (she knows she may not do this), squashed, pushed, etc. by her big sister. I put her in time-out twice but that seems to do nothing. I really have a tough time restraining myself and not getting too cross. Okay, I lie, I get unbelievably cross, so I guess I need to do a parenting course. I know what they’re going to say, praise the good and ignore the bad, walk away from the situation and when you’ve calmed down, deal with it. Easier said than done I tell you. In Cape Town, I belonged to a book club and quite a few of the members had children a year or 2 older than Zoe, so when I had Zoe, they were having their second one’s and they were always passing around all sorts of parenting books (The name Boundaries rings a bell). I smugly said I didn’t need them although I did know that my time was coming, I just didn’t know when. Well, my time has come, so I better phone and find out the names. I almost cannot wait until Ava can start to retaliate, although I know I’ll regret ever having said that. Oh dear, the screaming and tattle-tales that are heading my way.As I type this, they are playing like two little angels, unpacking every single toy in sight. I think I know what the problem was yesterday, all the shop assistants were making a huge fuss of Ava as she’s such a smiley, happy baby and Zoe did it to get some attention. I know that, but I’m not always going to be there to give her attention when Ava’s getting some. How do you do it with 3 and 4 kids or is there so little chance for individual attention that the kids don’t worry about it? Perhaps that’s why we (my brothers and I) fought so much?

In other exciting news, they are coming to put in our study/playroom desk and units this afternoon, so I will take some photos I promise. Oh, that’s happening in between our photo-shoot this afternoon at 4. The dogs are going to be packed off to my mom’s house this afternoon, although they’re busy having their garden landscaped so better leave the mutts inside then.

So today’s mantra is, praise the good, praise the good. I better go get praising then, while she’s being so good.


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